Today I woke up happy, ready to face the world.
Scrap that! Today I woke up with one thought in my head! Here we go again, I just wanted to lay in bed and be useless all day. I only got out of bed because I got bills to pay not because I look forward to living everyday. I have been asking myself a whole lot of question lately and it borders on “how did I get here?” I must have made series of bad decisions which I didn’t think anything of at the time: perhaps I liked the way it made me feel so why the hell not, I probably knew it was going to end this way and the truth is I didn’t listen. It is called living in the moment yeah.. If living in the moment was such a bad idea then why do we talk about it so much, we’d say ” all you have is now ; live in the moment” and probably regret it later. Is there any right rule to living ? Do you ever know how much the decisions you make now will affect you later? I understand all actions have consequences but how much? wouldn’t it be nice to know the end result of most things; people say there is no fun in that but I have a problem with the phrase “beauty of the unknown.”
What do you do when you no longer find comfort in something that used to feel like home? how does it make you feel to be so unsure of something you used to have so much faith in? it gets to a point where your heart aches at the thought of it and all you just want to do is go back in time and change the course of the tide; don’t you think life would be so much easier if we could all go back in time to avoid present realities,of course it would be but then there wouldn’t be consequences and we would all live a reckless life far worse than how we live now. There are no rules to living, be it living in the moment or not; it doesn’t matter whether you choose to be careful with how you live or not. Life ends up catching up with all of us and sometimes, it is not pretty.