I wish I could stay…

This post is inspired by the beautiful song Good Old Days by P!nk. She is one my favorites and I just got introduced to the wonderful work of art by my colleague this morning. How am I just finding out about this it! It’s so good, I have it on repeat. I am so emotional right now.

I remember the mountain in the woods close to my house, I’d always go there with my cousins and brother, we would buy Pepsi which was sold for a token at the time, take the Pepsi and climb all the way to the top. We were never afraid of heights, we’d drink and just play our hearts out till evening. I remember we had a company, it was this really naughty female monkey, I always looked forward to playing with her. Where did the days go to?  We grew up too fast, I don’t even talk to my cousins anymore, I don’t have their contacts, we are all busy living our lives. I think about this and I can’t help this nostalgic feeling. 

Back then, I always looked forward to the holidays, Christmas/new year was my favorite. It used to be long and the house was always so full. When did I become this person, this loner that can’t deal with many people around her anymore, what happened to me? I used to like a full house, I liked playing with my cousins, I loved laughing a lot, carefree with not a thing to worry about. Where did my childhood go? The world must be a really terrible place, I can’t find that girl anymore or maybe she is somewhere, lurking, hoping for a chance to be free again, perhaps she is far gone. I don’t know.

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I’d like to go back to the good old days, I’d like to go back to the mountain top with my bottle of Pepsi, I’d like to play with that monkey, I wonder if she is still alive. I’d like to go back to that time I used to stay up at night waiting for mama to come back with the soy milk I loved so much, I’d like to go back to the time I always looked forward to get my new dresses for Christmas. The expectancy and the glee of knowing I’d get a present soon. I miss the good old days. I wish I could go back, I wish I could stay.

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